阿斯顿大学(Aston University)在2017年QS世界大学就业能力排名中,名列全球第18,是英国学生满意度最高的大学TOP10之一,就业前景好是这所大学备受留学生喜爱的一大原因。阿斯顿以商科、工科、语言及教育专业尤为出色,本文将与大家分享的是UCAS系统最新一篇申请该校商业管理专业的优质文书。
范文如下:
In year 7 I was put into bottom set Maths, which I knew at the time wasn’t the place for me. Through self-determination and motivation, I was able to obtain a place in top set Maths by Year 9. From there onwards Mathematics started to become challenging for me, which was what truly caught my interest. For this reason analysing and solving problems have both become a passion of mine. Thankfully for me these skills form the foundation for my choice of a business degree.
点评:申请者开篇以数学吸引招生官,讲述了其小时候学习数学的经历,接着非常自然扯到商科,正是分析解决问题的能力构成了其选择就读商科专业的基础。申请者既谈到了为何选择商科,又展示了与商科相关的数学学识,一举两得。
My interest for firms and their financial management, developed when I first read about South Korea and their strategies to becoming one of the world’s fastest growing economies. I was so inspired by the financial analysis Korean businesses were undergoing, that I grew attached to their culture and so I started to teach myself the Korean language.
点评:申请者讲述了韩国经济发展对其商业视野及思维的影响,并说明为了进一步了解韩国文化,申请者甚至自学韩语,其超强的自学能力得到凸显。
Once starting Sixth Form, I was keen on joining extra-curricular activities to help boost my confidence when meeting new people. Signing up for the National Citizens Service gave me the opportunity of managing budgets for events that were carried out as well as allocating the resources needed. Later in the year, helping my own community was also something I wanted to take part in, and so I volunteered at my local library joint community centre. Every Wednesday, I worked the cashier on top of organizing which books were low in stock at the library. Throughout the year I was able to enhance my time management skills from balancing my volunteer work on top of being a Subject Advisor and Student Prefect for my Sixth Form.
点评:这一段申请者谈到了一些课外活动,包括参加经营一个组织和参加志愿工作。每一项活动,申请者都尽可能与本专业产生联系,比如managing budgets;worked the cashier等词句的使用,这些活动帮助申请者提升了时间管理技能,与组织领导能力。
Through Business Studies I was introduced to the corporate world; which showed me how businesses start up and encourage their sales to success, as well as enabling me to improve on my problem-solving and decision-making skills. Along with Economics showing me how trading internationally differentiates with each country, depending on their own economic position as well as the strength on their currency. Understanding how important managing a business is for its success and reputation encouraged me to visit a range of companies in London including UBM. Here I was given the chance to not only improve on my interview skills but also to experience their working environment. Media Studies has allowed me to become more open minded towards other people’s thoughts and opinions on certain topics. As almost everything in Media Studies is polysemic, this subject has given me the understanding of how and what people connote from a piece of media.
点评:申请者谈了其商科学习感悟,对商科的喜爱使其走访了英国各种公司。同时,申请者提到了自身的传媒学习,这些经验与知识正是一个商业管理学生所需要的。
Through my enhanced understanding of the corporate world and the financial operations that take place, I find this is what I am truly interested in. Having the skills to not only interpret an organisation’s market and financial situation, but also creating new corporate strategies, are key aspects which I am passionate about learning. At the same time as being able to show that I can challenge myself against academic standards; I believe studying this course will allow me to understand and demonstrate financial accounting which firms go through, in addition to the management of their operations.
点评:申请者再次强调对本专业的喜爱,并进一步深化——创新公司战略才是其学习的动力所在,在最后,申请者对这一专业未来学习做了美好展望。
整篇文章写作比较流畅,可以看出申请者可写的闪光点不多,因此挑选出与商科有些关系的点来展开文章。大多数申请留学的小伙伴在准备个人陈述时,会担心自己没做多少有价值的活动或有多好的成绩,没有啥点可以写。这时就要认真理出那些值得一提,还能与所申请专业产生联系的点来做文章,如果刻意提自己的成绩多好,活动多高大上反而让招生官觉得华而不实。
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